I usually can’t wait for that first cup of coffee in the morning; you know, the one that you actually get to drink when it is HOT, before anyone else has arisen? I like to go through any notices the kids have left for me on the desk or homework assignments that need signing. It has been especially good reading material of late. For the past few months or so, my oldest son, age 13 years, has been leaving me either various diagrams of the reproductive system or better yet, questions that consist of an interview which need to be discussed, and of course a signature to prove they were discussed.
One morning he was actually up and downstairs ahead of schedule. This happened to be the morning after he had left me a list of questions that he was supposed to ask an adult about when they were a teen regarding teen pregnancy and birth control. I thought he was going to choke on his cereal when I started to read it aloud and answer the questions. He quickly started to write my answers down, either to stop me from talking or in order to regain his appetite. He only paused when we came to a question which asked if we thought we would ever be able to place a baby up for adoption. My answer had been no, and he was surprised, because he is well informed with all that has transpired regarding donating our embryos. He wanted to know what was the difference. I told him to me the embryos represent a chance of a baby, but to actually carry and give birth to a baby and than give it up for adoption wouldn’t be something I could ever do.
This was all happening around the time of Marti and Brian’s visit with us this past March. I chuckle when I think of the morning after they left. This is when I came downstairs to find the male reproductive diagram (which needs labeling still), next to the coffee pot. He didn’t want to do this when they were there, so he had told the teacher I was working and he had to hand it in late. He had been embarrassed to tell me it needed completing while they were here.
This past Friday, report cards came home, indicating the close of the third marking period. I asked him this weekend if they were done with the “Family discussions” unit, and he said yes. I asked him if they ever mentioned IVF when discussing reproduction, and he said they only make mention of adoption, and I quote him as saying, “of a baby, not an embryo.” We started to talk about it a little more, and I told him that my mind set has changed on lots of issues from when I was his age and where I stand now, largely due to the fact that I’ve grown and learned from life experiences. He was surprised in the advances that had occurred in IVF in that time period, and that I hadn’t heard of embryo donation at all until about 7 years ago. I told him I was about his age when the first “test-tube baby” was conceived and born in England, and he was amazed. I told him I was fascinated not only by the fact that science had been able to achieve this, but that anyone would actually do it. Little did I know it was the beginning of what would lead to the answer to our prayers.