SPECIAL CONSIDERATION

Lately, Jeremy and I have been discussing our remaining embryos and what our future plans might be. Right now, Jeremy says we’re done, but I’m not sure. I figure that until we can all sleep through the night regularly that we can’t make that decision with a clear and rational head. What Jeremy really says is “no more babies; we can adopt an older child if we really want another.” While he says no more babies, I say, “but, what about the others?” As I’ve mentioned before, Grant and Maria were labeled as “special consideration” because of a sibling born with a VSD (ventricular septal defect, aka hole in the heart). What I didn’t know until recently is that we are the only couple in the NEDC’s history to adopt special consideration embryos. I understand a couple’s reluctance to go with these embryos because for many they have already been through years of infertility and embryo adoption is the last stop. Why take the risk of a problem? Truth of the matter is there is no guarantee with any baby, whether conceived naturally or through IVF, that there will be no issues. If we put our embryos back in the adoption pool would anyone ever adopt them? Jeremy thinks (hopes) that others have read our story, see the VSD consideration and will remember Grant and Maria and how perfect they are. Yes, Maria did have a small VSD, but it closed on its own and caused no issues whatsoever. In fact, it was so small that it went unnoticed for several weeks and had they not been in the NICU due to being premature we likely would have never known that she had it. During our profile selection, I did research on heart defects and learned that only eight out of 1000 babies were born with some type of heart defect and of those defects, 30% are VSDs. In the grand scheme of things, the odds are very small. Being obedient to God’s direction, we picked the embryos we were supposed to have. I could have easily let fear sway my decision and gone with “the giants” but am so thankful that we didn’t. Many asked why we didn’t go with the “strongest” so we would have the best chance at success, but 1 Corinthians 1:27 tells us that God uses the weak things of the world to shame the strong. I think it’s evident that we were blessed in our decision and we hope that others will consider the “weak” among us. And maybe one day, they’ll see that same special consideration profile that Jeremy and I had on our coffee table and heed the call from God to step out on faith and be blessed just as we have been.

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