I recently read the most powerful parenting article that I’ve ever encountered. “Notes From a Dragon Mom” put all the mommy wars and daily parenting decisions into perspective. When speaking of “mommy wars,” I’m talking about the strong, and sometimes downright nasty, statements and judgments that are made in regards to various parenting decisions. While I love the internet for the vast information it can provide, it is frustrating with all the conflicting information and how people can hide behind their computer screens and launch cyber missile attacks at others.
Pull up most any “mommy blog” and you can easily see the battle lines being drawn…breast feeding vs. bottle-feeding, attachment parenting vs. sleep training, daycare vs. stay at home parents, standard vaccination schedules vs. alternatives. A couple of blog comments are made and soon, the discussion has digressed into virtual mudslinging and hair pulling that gets us nowhere. I have opinions on each of these and if asked for advice, I’ll give it, but I am not going to degrade another person because they make a different choice. Children are raised in many different ways; and for the most part turn out just fine.
Any parent wants the best for their children and looks forward to a long and bright future and makes parenting decisions based upon what they believe is best for the child and family. But, what if there was no future? Would you get so worked up because your child wasn’t hitting milestones as quickly as others their age, or didn’t get the highest grade in the class, or make the team? The future can be important and each parent should have some future focus when it comes to child rearing, but we run the risk of looking so far into the future, that we forget about today.
It’s easy to have strong opinions and want to share what you believe is right, and healthy, and most beneficial for your children and their future and forget that at the end of the day, we’re not guaranteed tomorrow. I think Emily Rapp sums it up perfectly, “Parenting, I’ve come to understand, is about loving my child today. Now. In fact, for any parent, anywhere, that’s all there is.”