Many couples choose to seek the services of a reproductive endocrinologist upon acknowledging their inability to conceive. At this point, many couples consider either domestic or international adoption to build their family. Because of the strides made in creating embryos and ability to store them safely, as well as fewer newborns being available for domestic adoption, couples today are considering embryo adoption.
Embryo adoption “ticks many of the same boxes as domestic adoption” with the added benefit of the adoptive mother having the joy of not only carrying but also the beauty of giving birth to their adopted child. The couple has the blessing of having nine months to bond with and anticipate the infant’s addition to their family.
Much like domestic adoption, couples who are pursuing embryo adoption, will want to explore the type of relationship they would like with the donating family. Coordinators in embryo adoption seek to find donor and recipient families who have the same desires as to the level of openness in their relationship. For some families this is a very difficult decision as they are approaching embryo adoption with a heavy heart because of the great losses that they have experienced. Very often recipient families learn that the donor families well understand their loss as the donor embryos were created because they, too, were having troubling conceiving. Repeatedly, embryo donors voiced to me that they “wished someone had offered me embryos as we probably would not have created our own embryos.”
Recipient families come to embryo adoption out of loss, but embryo adoption becomes a solution for their own desire to have a family as well as giving the donor’s embryos an opportunity for life.